Wednesday Quiz: Carbonation!
January 31, 2001
Sorry, all. I spent last night spoofing another article for the Saltmine crowd. For your amusement, here's the last one. It makes fun of Tacoma for being stinky and undereducated. Tacoma.pdf Go get your own darned Acrobat reader. And now for something completely different... The Wednesday Quiz Today's quiz comes from the young and lovely M~, who asks, "If you...
Sorry, all. I spent last night spoofing another article for the Saltmine crowd. For your amusement, here's the last one. It makes fun of Tacoma for being stinky and undereducated. Tacoma.pdf Go get your own darned Acrobat reader. And now for something completely different... The Wednesday Quiz Today's quiz comes from the young and lovely M~, who asks, "If you...
Q&A Tuesday
January 30, 2001
A lot of miscellany has been piling up in my mailbox. Thought I'd get rid of some of it. Q: Is hyperbole the most underused literary tool ever, or what? A: Holy smokes, is it EVER! There should be some sort of universal law that everyone on Earth should have to use hyperbole in every single sentence! Have you ever...
A lot of miscellany has been piling up in my mailbox. Thought I'd get rid of some of it. Q: Is hyperbole the most underused literary tool ever, or what? A: Holy smokes, is it EVER! There should be some sort of universal law that everyone on Earth should have to use hyperbole in every single sentence! Have you ever...
Not a Ray of Sunshine
January 29, 2001
If you want to make a beeline for depression, try walking downtown Seattle at eight o'clock in the evening on a Sunday night. There is nothing more dismal. The streets are littered with the miscellany of the weekend cruisers, shoppers, whatever the heck people are doing downtown. I don't even know who cleans it up, but at eight o'clock on...
If you want to make a beeline for depression, try walking downtown Seattle at eight o'clock in the evening on a Sunday night. There is nothing more dismal. The streets are littered with the miscellany of the weekend cruisers, shoppers, whatever the heck people are doing downtown. I don't even know who cleans it up, but at eight o'clock on...
Tell Me Stories (II)
January 27, 2001
Part 2 of 2 (part 1) "That's cool," she says. Pause. "That's neat," she says. "Yeah," I say, deciding to hold eye contact after all. "I don't think I got a very good transcript, however. "Can I turn to you?" I say. "Yeah." "What's your name?" Look how easy that was! Amazing! "Lisa." Lisa is in an electric wheelchair. She...
Part 2 of 2 (part 1) "That's cool," she says. Pause. "That's neat," she says. "Yeah," I say, deciding to hold eye contact after all. "I don't think I got a very good transcript, however. "Can I turn to you?" I say. "Yeah." "What's your name?" Look how easy that was! Amazing! "Lisa." Lisa is in an electric wheelchair. She...
Tell Me Stories
January 26, 2001
Part 1 of 2 (part 2) I talked to two people on the bus on the way home from fencing on Thursday. It started with this scruffy guy wearing camouflage, and smelling of not enough baths. I heard him get on the bus behind me and ask the driver, "Hey man. Yeah. So what does this cost?" There's a big...
Part 1 of 2 (part 2) I talked to two people on the bus on the way home from fencing on Thursday. It started with this scruffy guy wearing camouflage, and smelling of not enough baths. I heard him get on the bus behind me and ask the driver, "Hey man. Yeah. So what does this cost?" There's a big...
Sex, Money, Relationships
January 25, 2001
Follow me for a moment here. There are three things that you can talk to absolutely anyone over puberty with, right? With the possible exception of your parents, you can sit down with a complete stranger from anywhere and soon be happily chatting about sex, money, or relationships. They are the three subjects that constantly affect everyone's life. They are...
Follow me for a moment here. There are three things that you can talk to absolutely anyone over puberty with, right? With the possible exception of your parents, you can sit down with a complete stranger from anywhere and soon be happily chatting about sex, money, or relationships. They are the three subjects that constantly affect everyone's life. They are...
Jens is a German, He Drove an Opel
January 24, 2001
Friendship is hard. There's all sorts of weird work you have to do to maintain it. And then factors like distance intervene and things get exponentially harder. Heck, I was not able to maintain a distance relationship over a paltry 30 miles separation. How are you supposed to even deal with real distances involved? I spent a month in the...
Friendship is hard. There's all sorts of weird work you have to do to maintain it. And then factors like distance intervene and things get exponentially harder. Heck, I was not able to maintain a distance relationship over a paltry 30 miles separation. How are you supposed to even deal with real distances involved? I spent a month in the...
Driving
January 23, 2001
I was born to this world for exactly one task. All my upbringing has been geared towards polishing the finely grained genetic material that generations of parentage have labored to produce in preparation for my one task. I have sacrificed many things in laser-focused pursuit of my one goal; house cleaning, fashion sense, rhythm, any ability to dance, maturity, ironing...
I was born to this world for exactly one task. All my upbringing has been geared towards polishing the finely grained genetic material that generations of parentage have labored to produce in preparation for my one task. I have sacrificed many things in laser-focused pursuit of my one goal; house cleaning, fashion sense, rhythm, any ability to dance, maturity, ironing...
Suicide Saturday
January 20, 2001
I love what the age of almost complete moral relativism we live in. Posit: I should kill myself. Agree or disagree? I'll bet a dollar you said disagree (unless you know me, in which case you're probably composing your email offering useful suggestions). If anyone you knew suggested that they ought to kill themselves, would you think that's a viable...
I love what the age of almost complete moral relativism we live in. Posit: I should kill myself. Agree or disagree? I'll bet a dollar you said disagree (unless you know me, in which case you're probably composing your email offering useful suggestions). If anyone you knew suggested that they ought to kill themselves, would you think that's a viable...
Wednesday Quiz: Monsters
January 19, 2001
I am always surprised by what is easy and what is not easy. Is it because we are generally trained to think about others before ourselves? Or at least only talk as if we do? That's noble and all, but what about when I want to hear about you? When I ask you my weird questions, I am dying to...
I am always surprised by what is easy and what is not easy. Is it because we are generally trained to think about others before ourselves? Or at least only talk as if we do? That's noble and all, but what about when I want to hear about you? When I ask you my weird questions, I am dying to...
Regardless of Sex, Color, or Money
January 18, 2001
This is not so much found writing as raw theft. Someone is owed an apology from me. At tutoring last night, I was sitting at the PC while H~ worked on the next PC over, and Microsoft Word's File Open dialogue box was sitting up on the screen. So I just started flipping around through files. Most of them were...
This is not so much found writing as raw theft. Someone is owed an apology from me. At tutoring last night, I was sitting at the PC while H~ worked on the next PC over, and Microsoft Word's File Open dialogue box was sitting up on the screen. So I just started flipping around through files. Most of them were...
Purposeless Collage
January 17, 2001
[Save yourself from wasting five precious minutes of your life on the intervening words and jump to the Wednesday Quiz.] Do you know how some days you find yourself with three and a half hours to kill, and no desire whatsoever to work? You sit there and say to yourself, "I have no idea how I'm going to bill today,...
[Save yourself from wasting five precious minutes of your life on the intervening words and jump to the Wednesday Quiz.] Do you know how some days you find yourself with three and a half hours to kill, and no desire whatsoever to work? You sit there and say to yourself, "I have no idea how I'm going to bill today,...
The Territorial Adult
January 16, 2001
Courtesy of my friend, J~. She writes: ---- Original Message ---- From: "J~" To: Scott McJSent: Sunday, January 14, 2001 1:02 AMSubject: The amazing shrinking world So I think I'm going backwards in life instead of forwards...is our scope supposed to expand as we get older? On all fronts, but more specifically for this case, actual miles. When I lived...
Courtesy of my friend, J~. She writes: ---- Original Message ---- From: "J~" To: Scott McJSent: Sunday, January 14, 2001 1:02 AMSubject: The amazing shrinking world So I think I'm going backwards in life instead of forwards...is our scope supposed to expand as we get older? On all fronts, but more specifically for this case, actual miles. When I lived...
It Was RIGHT HERE
January 15, 2001
Granted, this is not of general interest. However, I wanted to take a moment to commemorate a particularly successful prank. Plumbing life for meaning and humor business as usual tomorrow. Every now and again, my nuclear family gets together for a Family Dinner Night. Yesterday, my parents came over and hung out and shot some pool, and then we went...
Granted, this is not of general interest. However, I wanted to take a moment to commemorate a particularly successful prank. Plumbing life for meaning and humor business as usual tomorrow. Every now and again, my nuclear family gets together for a Family Dinner Night. Yesterday, my parents came over and hung out and shot some pool, and then we went...
Baby's First Rave
January 13, 2001
Friday, 1/12/2001 16:22:05 1:15pm Why did I agree to go to a rave with J~? In the same way that you can't picture the Pope doing the "Wayne's World, Excellent!" bit from SNL, you cannot picture me at a rave. Granted, I'm just testing drugs. I'm not there to party. I wouldn't know how to party if party came with...
Friday, 1/12/2001 16:22:05 1:15pm Why did I agree to go to a rave with J~? In the same way that you can't picture the Pope doing the "Wayne's World, Excellent!" bit from SNL, you cannot picture me at a rave. Granted, I'm just testing drugs. I'm not there to party. I wouldn't know how to party if party came with...
Too Late to Think
January 12, 2001
"I live in a place called Context," the dirty bird said. "It's such a terrible place, I usually spend most of my time out of it." -TPT After hockey tonight, I came home, and there was a message on my machine. I pushed the play button, and Tom Robbin's voice asked me to call him back, and made fun of...
"I live in a place called Context," the dirty bird said. "It's such a terrible place, I usually spend most of my time out of it." -TPT After hockey tonight, I came home, and there was a message on my machine. I pushed the play button, and Tom Robbin's voice asked me to call him back, and made fun of...
Finger Food
January 11, 2001
[And hey, maybe you haven't taken the Wednesday Quiz yet?] So I had lunch a few days ago with the ever-delightful F~ and her brother, A~. We drove over to Bellevue, chatting over the dismal state of world affairs and so forth, and found the target Indian restaurant. This was supposed to be my experiment in vegetarianism. I had asked...
[And hey, maybe you haven't taken the Wednesday Quiz yet?] So I had lunch a few days ago with the ever-delightful F~ and her brother, A~. We drove over to Bellevue, chatting over the dismal state of world affairs and so forth, and found the target Indian restaurant. This was supposed to be my experiment in vegetarianism. I had asked...
Bridge Night
January 10, 2001
I'm feeling pretty flush today, I have to say. Not only did I win the pot for the entire year at bridge last month, but I also took fist place at this month's Men's Bridge Club. Sheesh! I hadn't even finished spending last year's money! To honor my astonishing 300% ROI last night, today we present Conversations From the Bridge...
I'm feeling pretty flush today, I have to say. Not only did I win the pot for the entire year at bridge last month, but I also took fist place at this month's Men's Bridge Club. Sheesh! I hadn't even finished spending last year's money! To honor my astonishing 300% ROI last night, today we present Conversations From the Bridge...
(Addendum) Wednesday Quiz: The Monsters of Your Fear
January 10, 2001
jump to the Wednesday Quiz)-->[I'm so sorry. I completely forgot to attach the Wednesday Quiz to today's ramble. Here it is. Please vote.] The real question is next week, and it is also about monsters. Lots of monster talk this week and next week. Because I'm not able to make it to tutoring today, the kid/adult question is deferred, and...
jump to the Wednesday Quiz)-->[I'm so sorry. I completely forgot to attach the Wednesday Quiz to today's ramble. Here it is. Please vote.] The real question is next week, and it is also about monsters. Lots of monster talk this week and next week. Because I'm not able to make it to tutoring today, the kid/adult question is deferred, and...
The Matrix o' Morality
January 09, 2001
Poor Maslow was given rather short shrift yesterday, and I feel badly about that. If you don't remember, Maslow is usually represented as a five to seven level pyramid, that you climb up. Much like Kohlberg, you can't realize higher levels till you've secured the lowers. Maslow: "Physiological Needs. Biological needs such as oxygen, food, water, warmth/coolness, protection from storms...
Poor Maslow was given rather short shrift yesterday, and I feel badly about that. If you don't remember, Maslow is usually represented as a five to seven level pyramid, that you climb up. Much like Kohlberg, you can't realize higher levels till you've secured the lowers. Maslow: "Physiological Needs. Biological needs such as oxygen, food, water, warmth/coolness, protection from storms...
Moral Compass
January 08, 2001
Every now and again, I like to check in with my old buddies Maslow and Kohlberg and see where I'm at in this world. Maslow's quick. "Am I self-actualized yet? Nope. Ah well. Better luck next month." Kohlberg's more of a mess. When I was a young lad, just out of knickers, my family used to play Scruples. A board...
Every now and again, I like to check in with my old buddies Maslow and Kohlberg and see where I'm at in this world. Maslow's quick. "Am I self-actualized yet? Nope. Ah well. Better luck next month." Kohlberg's more of a mess. When I was a young lad, just out of knickers, my family used to play Scruples. A board...
Moving Day
January 07, 2001
Okay. Yes. You have to be you. That goes without saying. And I support your ability to be and do whatever you want. Choose your own path, face your own consequences. The great American ideal of individualism. Cheers. But, in some things, there are rules. And when there are rules, I really want you to follow them. I am counting...
Okay. Yes. You have to be you. That goes without saying. And I support your ability to be and do whatever you want. Choose your own path, face your own consequences. The great American ideal of individualism. Cheers. But, in some things, there are rules. And when there are rules, I really want you to follow them. I am counting...
Completely Uninteresting Stuff
January 05, 2001
[Much like hearing about other people's kids, or their houses if you're not a homeowner, or their pets if you are not a pet person, so many of the notes you find are almost completely uninteresting. Today, for your perusal, two completely dull bits, and one interesting but unoriginal bit.] Dull Bit #1: Scrap of Greenbar [It is a piece...
[Much like hearing about other people's kids, or their houses if you're not a homeowner, or their pets if you are not a pet person, so many of the notes you find are almost completely uninteresting. Today, for your perusal, two completely dull bits, and one interesting but unoriginal bit.] Dull Bit #1: Scrap of Greenbar [It is a piece...
More High School Hijinks
January 04, 2001
[Let me just take a moment to explain that yesterday's post did not come without sacrifice. The things I do for you to entertain! I had a touch of fun with the Harper files, and thought it was only fair to continue posting my pathetic adolescent writings in a fair proportion to those I put up of complete strangers. Balance....
[Let me just take a moment to explain that yesterday's post did not come without sacrifice. The things I do for you to entertain! I had a touch of fun with the Harper files, and thought it was only fair to continue posting my pathetic adolescent writings in a fair proportion to those I put up of complete strangers. Balance....
The Harper Files
January 03, 2001
[This is me. Scott. I had to reboot my lighting PC (X10, yummy!) and there on the ground was The Harper Files, in a manila folder so labeled. Circa 1987. All sorts of crazy stuff happened in 1987. I was 16. There was an assassination attempt on the Pope (true!). I drove a white Toyota Celica. Regan was eternally President....
[This is me. Scott. I had to reboot my lighting PC (X10, yummy!) and there on the ground was The Harper Files, in a manila folder so labeled. Circa 1987. All sorts of crazy stuff happened in 1987. I was 16. There was an assassination attempt on the Pope (true!). I drove a white Toyota Celica. Regan was eternally President....
Holy OCD
January 02, 2001
[Today's reflections come to us courtesy of Pacific Biometrics, Inc. At least, it's written in three parts on a sheet of from a tablet of their paper. Today's thoughts are largely God derived. A lot of a lot of the found writings that I have come across are religiously themed. Do religious people write more? Or is it just that...
[Today's reflections come to us courtesy of Pacific Biometrics, Inc. At least, it's written in three parts on a sheet of from a tablet of their paper. Today's thoughts are largely God derived. A lot of a lot of the found writings that I have come across are religiously themed. Do religious people write more? Or is it just that...
Project Aware
January 01, 2001
[This week is all about more found stuff, while I work on another little sub-project. Apologies. I’ll try to be clever. Today’s submission is really the best of the week. Found on the bus as I rode home from fencing one night. A little kid picked it up, his dad took it from him, flipped through it, dropped it on...
[This week is all about more found stuff, while I work on another little sub-project. Apologies. I’ll try to be clever. Today’s submission is really the best of the week. Found on the bus as I rode home from fencing one night. A little kid picked it up, his dad took it from him, flipped through it, dropped it on...